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Viva Marriage!
By Christine Rodgers, Winsted
On May 13, 2003 my husband and I will celebrate 30 years of marriage. In these times when this institution has taken such a bum rap I want to speak out in support of the union between one man and one woman who declare their love before God, family and friends. Having lived through the '50s and '60s to the present, we have experienced the fallout of the subculture of the sexual revolution, the technological advances of the '70s and '80s and the impact of the "me generation." Through these years we have seen an unprecedented attack on the family.
As a teenager in the '60s attending a diocesan Catholic high school, "segregation" to me meant boys on one side of the school, girls on the other. Never did we mingle except at the occasional homecoming or spring dance. It was a senior privilege to have co-ed lunch period. During this same time frame the Vietnam conflict was broadcast every evening on TV, and girls were burning their undergarments to show the world how free they could and would be. Woodstock and all the abuse of drugs and alcohol were prevalent, with love beads and tie-dyed shirts the fashion fads, while some were proposing the amoral attitude that "if it feels good, do it." Then as we entered the '70s a new evil entered our society—the legalization of abortion on demand. Now not only were women free to choose to eliminate an inconvenient child, but men could feel free to "sow their seeds" and walk away from the responsibility. It has been estimated that some 40 million abortions have taken place in this country in the last 29 years. That’s a lot of seed sowing and a lot of hiking away from responsibility. Why bother getting married?
It was in 1973 that my husband John and I entered into our sacramental marriage. Being the second oldest of eight children whose parents had divorced just two years earlier, I admit I was very nervous walking down that aisle. With every step I took I heard the echoes of the world in my mind—you can get divorced if it doesn't work out. Then I saw his face smiling at me. Within a moment I knew it would be all right. I don't wish to paint an inaccurate fairy tale picture, because that would not only be ludicrous but it would also be untrue. We have struggled enormously through the past 30 years, adjusting to each other's idiosyncrasies, coping with shortcomings and facing our own faults and failings. Although none of this has been easy, it has been enormously worthwhile. (As for myself, I discovered that I have a gift that most women of Irish descent receive with their nuptial blessings—how and where to place disproportionate guilt on their husbands and children when most deserving.)
Though these years may have had their difficulties, I am so grateful for so many people in my life. I would be remiss if I didn't thank my mom, who gave me the gift of faith and who taught me by example how to laugh and not take myself too seriously. I thank my husband John for making my life fun, interesting and full of love, and for never walking out when I know a lesser man would have. And the fruit of our marriage, our extraordinary children who continue to bring joy into an otherwise very ordinary life: I love you all. Viva marriage!
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